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Journal: June 28, 2003

June 28, 2003


i dont have cable. when i was a kid, i used to tape tv shows onto my tape player and listen to them before i fell asleep every night. i would listen to the same show everday till the next week when i would tape the next episode. i was weird. did my mom think i was weird. i guess if i was a kid now, i would just get a computer chip inserted into my brain and i would watch whatever i wanted on the screen in my eyelids. but back in the late eighties, taping episodes of full house and listening back through cheap headphones was so high tech. ive been thinking a lot about having kids. not actualy HAVING kids, but having, like what it would be like to HAVE kids, like what it would be like to HAVE a car.


pros cons.


if i had a kid i would definetly be aware of their feet in an airplane. it only seems fair that no matter what age you are you shouldnt kick the shit out of the back of the seat in front of you. it seems fair that if kicking is allowed then i should kick their seats, like if i want to stretch my legs out and instead of awkwardly shifting around between my bag and the metal bolting the seat into the floor, that i would field kick the back of their seat intill i felt like the muscles in my legs were sufficiently stretched.


yes and while i am at it, im going to park my three baggage carts, carry on luggage and entire family right in front of the baggage belt so that no one can get around me and when people do run into me i just might push them for no apparent reason, since really i am in the wrong, but hell, i can do whatever i want cause i have three baggage carts and i obviously never get embarassed by how much room i take up in this world.


and since im going to do that why not lazily wander up the middle of the airport, and angrily complain about how narror the seats are and how bad the service was........all the while not paying attention to my kids who are riding the baggage belt and screaming and hitting other peoples bags, and generaly asserting ownership over the entire airport because people will be too afriad to yell or remove my kids because god knows i will slap them with a lawsuit or call the police.


wicked.


im totaly having kids tonight.


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